Bad girl!:(

not happy with myself again!:( if i am the only person in my way !i still cant kill myself, nor convince or motivate myself to step out... nor can fool it into distracting nor force it and shove it to the side... nor pursuade it , nor influence it, nor argue with it and win over... not even order or request, nor get others to help, so i wud rather wait for something out of the blue to do the due one fine day!