I never thought of him like a close friend! But wat was he then? someone i shared so much of me FOC

His Questions are teasing and bugging! as if he is trying to know my secrets for his own pleasure...

I never felt very close to him, or had feelings for him...or cud care for him, and nor i cud sense any of it from him...

We liked talking to each other cuz we found each other interesting or well he had this idea to know ppl and learn and get better... i was may be a subject he studied to gain insights like no books good give...

and i had realised it...

But no doubt he was a sort of releif when i was going through some troubled times... he always encouraging me to feel better, not guilty for any thing i sometimes assumed were my mistakes...

But over the days and since my love affair... it was as if his nosiness started to hurt me and make me feel uncomfortable... there was a dread when he asked me this question... "wats up" as if trying to know my plans and wat i was upto... and somehow mess with them... and i stopped telling him a thing...

i found it hard to say "nothing" when i know it wasnt the truth and how earlier i wud tell every little detail of thoughts in my mind... now i knew going beyond that phrase cud potentionall cost me...

and i find that sarcasm in his voice... blaming me for lying not understanding my need for it...and yesterday when he proposed for me to tell him my life story so he cud get a plot for his movie... i laughed a little in myself... thinking... how easily ppl cash on other ppls stories... making blocikbuster to sell some masala...i didnt say it all out...understanding that this urge isnt so bad... but i am glad its juts that earlier i had suspected he growing interest in me ... on sexual front which was even hard for me to cope... that was the reason why i felt him to be like predating over me... watching me... trying to know my activities... and i wish i cud delete him from FB so i cud juts know someone is not following me...

i have considerably gotten over my habbit to blurt out everything that crosses my mind on FB oblivion of how many ppl of how many profile read it... i still am not totally over it... like this blog... i wonder if any one who knows me that close reads it... and wat he will think of me next time he /she meets me...

I used to think H is someone of a better friend then AB (The one), and AB hated it, telling me thats cuz u havent known him in person that u trust him... in ur imagination... i now feel he is may be right... but then trusting AB is not safe...

except for my family and brothers... i am really not sure who to trust completely not even salman khan... i do feel all my respect for him is bound to go down once i meet him... its always so happens... i have this huge image built in my mind abt someone and when i meet them it comes crashing down...

i hope SK u dont disappoint me... i wish u are strong enuf to retain wat u say u beleive..

as for those who want to know my story to create blcok buster... its my life... if anyone shud benefit from it it shud be me... not the world around..:)

but life is not a money making business.. life is a sacred, divine givin space for sinners to do some good and return back to their eternal abode...