But my reactions as i look on the guys i can think to be my potential mates... other than u... i feel i kind of a stoppage... which wud not let me move... unless i am asked to close my eyes and let them have me...
so why do i freak out? what is my problem? i thought i was waiting for you... but now you are gone... sort of? and though i thought i will never want to be with anyone else...i still want all those good things happening to me...and i am going to let my guard and fears not rule me... but my displeasure is the worst to handle and get out of my way to try something like a marriage...
With you my fear and incapabilities stood out like red signals... with others my displeasure and disgust stops me from giving them a thought... let alone deciding them as my partner for life...
i dont know how will u marry? and what was in me that stopped u in your tracks from marrying me...i am sure it was something to do with my kiddish attitude and my not so giving in or may be ur own insecurities... which i never gave much thought too... i felt its going to get fine...
i am so lost with myself now... yes i was worried abt getting married... cuz i ddnt like the guys... those i liked i never cud get ... i dont know how this will end... wat i need to do to like a man, one man... so much better that i never doubt or run away again... and i get kids and dont fear i wont do
went on one of the portals.... spotted some sweet faces... but i am one... and i need but one.. tum apnay thay... i thot... now u r not...thanx so much...
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