Whats ur day going to be like?

This day is dedicated to




water (10 glasses),




songs of salman and madhuri,







the movie tezab,



the rainy weahter,




the pizza the drink,



the memories of u and me



and some beauty tips i learned yesterday...



some sweet messages, from me to them and from them to me



and some fruits



and lots of prayers and wishes



and singing



Some recording




and some dance moves i need to master.



wat else... u think this is productive enuf... i dont want to doubt! just trying to fill days with stuff i wont regret.keeping away the unwanted without hurting a soul! wats ur day going to be like today!

i juts hope this all somehow extends to the whole day length and i am not short of anything to do to have time to feel how incomplete and broken my life is without u!

i love the above activities. all of them. ALL I WISH IS TO BE BUSY ENUF TO NEVER FEEL SORRY, TO NEVER FEEL ANGRY TO NEVER FEEL MAD TO NEVER FEEL DEPRESSED TO NEVER FEEL OUT OF PLACE OR SHAPE AND TO NEVER NEVER HATE MY FOLKS AND YOU AND GOD AND LIFE.

ONLY LOVE LOVE AND LOVE!

Songs that make me happy and i imagine

Me and Salman Khan:P

hehe



Heart is stupid, heart is mad:P

Keeps you awake all night
steals sleep from eyes
makes u see true and fake dreams
makes u cry makes u smile

heart is mad, heart is a tard:D

for my non urdu speaking friends...

and this women is my all time favorite darling, women who i have been inspired and wish i cud have followed in footsteps...

Madhuri Dixit...

and if u did like her you shud just see her in this one...

and anil... my all time fav song, i dont know it touches me so deep that i dont know if i will ever get over this song ever...


love it to bits and pieces and cry everytime...everytime ...and come out more alive then before:D



and yes if u guys can call me madhuri... i am hoping i will may be reflect a slightest percent of the beauty she has...ok i know there is no comparision.... but just so i can feel it for a moment...please!:D

Thank u!

Love you all!

whats the Pill for this!

i wish i can have a memory loss and eraze some unnecessary information from my memory disk...my mind is seriously not a positive thing when it knows my weak areas... and it keeps displayng it to me every moment 24 /7 and the only time i am without it is when i am busy chatting with someone or busy being happy...

alone... i am being tortured with it! literally!

God if you cant help me, send someone who can. pls!

I dont want to die for nothing!

Stay with Me!

I messed it again... but not knowingly i swear

May be there is a kid in me... which makes it hard for me to act like grownup.

But the reason why i dont is cuz i want to do it my way the natural way, not an induced world regulated way

He wanted to call me or me to call him if i am comfortable and i told him no i am not. and the only thing possible is email.

i know... this wont work like this... but when u mishandle me, this is the aftermath...

its one thing to care for u... its other to know i am safe with you...

I have had enuf and i wont take it unless u make me comfortable again...how, thats a million dollar question you should use your heart to answer... if only you want to.

till then i will only talk to u on email, whenever i get this uncontrollable impulse

I am so sorry abt this... its like i want to draw you out and myself without stirring a thing or may be the devil, which is on the watch out, making it a million times tougher then it is!

but we dont really have time for this or may be we have... and all i need is patience more of it.

if i really ask myself, the only thing i need is i can talk to u... we can be in touch till there is a need for me to breathe...thats all i need to have you to listen to me, hear me and answer me, and giving me the strength to bear it all!

Bloggers Meetup!

Bloggers meetup! yey! i am invited!yeyyy:P i thot u jerks(kidding) will kick me out yeyyy!:D no... u didnt yeeyyy... we shalll rock

yes... farida its a meetup not the prom... dont be too happy u know wat happens everytime u r too happy abt something... jee! exactly... relax breathe:)

thanx hamza and ateeq!:)

and atteq keep ur mouth shut abt the confession!
:P

Rain!!! (boys under 30 donot read beyond line 16) a pledge if u can keep!

i love you rains
i love the showers,
i love the smell of you, the feel of you the depth of you the substance of you

i love the thunder and the lightning strike too
it fills me with awe and mesmerizes me
reminding me of the Glory my lord posesses

so to day when i sat there drenching myself
shuddering with cold, it was cuz of the love of you

so you poured with more vigor, trying to make me runaway

but this is all i had to say to you

i love you rain so pour as hard as you can, but today u wont be able to beat me, to scare me.

doesnt matter if i get sick, doesnt matter i get a cold, doesnt matter if i die now

doesnt matter i feel like a fool, doesnt matter i am the only one

let me be ready for u anyday anytime, to love you regardless

for i know rain, i loved you from the day i was born!

and i wait all those dry, hot harsh days just to feel u on my skin once again
to drench me in ur kisses until there is no place left in me thats not been touched by ur tender, warm, and hot yet wet feel telling me that you love me too

all the way to heaven

today we made love endlessly you and me and i can now say i am ready to take the pains along with the gains...or i am getting there!

I love you rain...and the fact you are God gifted makes it all so absolutely beautiful!

doing what my heart says...

hello folks...hello me... hello u

how wud u feel when u were dying every day and becoming alive... when u die u feel u wont feel life again and when u are awaken to life you cant remember what death was like... you can blame it on the memory loss i have...


yesterday was bad... today was badder...i saw a nighmare or a truth i had been closing my eyes to for long, for i dont have a heart to see or experience and live it...its the most painful thing... which i hope God somehow chooses to never have me to see...but God sometimes in his perfection and the desire for me to meet his endless expectation, doesnt listen to my cries...

he just does it anyways...and i can only wish to die...but it doesnt come... thats the courage you are asked to have when u live down here... to face the worst of all things and no u never going to be an easy death, or escape... feel it, live it, bear it... and then come out stronger, better, fuller, saner...

thats wat he wants...

No please will ever do... if those past three nightmares had not been true, i wud have easily let it fall out andf forget abt... but the fact that my nightmares happen, and they come to teach me one thing... that girl, its going to happen... so be a little ready for it... but i promise you it will pass you and you will smile again... or get above it... above every one of ur fear... and at the end... i will be waiting for you with arms open...

i will take u with all those wounds, pains, peices of u... and i know when u will come to me... i will heal it all...

if u are bound to heal us God, why you pain us then... why? why not just let me stay in one peice?

cant say what he wud say to it... but i know... it doesnt matter sometimes if he will be there or not in the end with open arms... i just want him to come and grab me now when i am abt to break in million pieces...

dont let me see it alone, embrace me now for i wont be able to take it God...i dont know why? whats such a big deal, but it is... like you snatch the bite from a hungry persons mouth, or deny water to a thrsty when he had come walking in the heat, or when u take away a beautiful dream from someones eyes when its abt to happen...

I love you God...why cuz you are the one who will eventually give me every one of my wish...no matter how many times u deny it...no one but u will bring me back my smiles.

but cant i just ask you not to let me have to experience this ... can u just do it some other way!