Thursday, November 5, 2015

Being Me!

I need to evaluate myself. Who am I, what am I and know for sure so I can not be influenced by what others think or believe.

When he left me I started to feel I am not worthy of his love. Something is wrong with me... May be I am not made for relationships or marriage.

I know I have weaknesses, but does that make it impossible for me to be entitled to a good, positive thriving, real, honest and beautiful life with another who I value and wish to be with.

I do know during our small relationship there were things I would say or do which I am not particularly proud of. But deep down inside me i know I tried my best to support and love him through whatever I was capable of while living moments I know I may never have the chance to ever live again. I may have taken a lot for granted: never thought i will have to let go of him; or having him by my side will not remain a norm. I may not have thanked him enough for the nice things or gave him more of the nicer things he might have expected.

But This is who i am. This is who i will remain being. I cannot let go of my essence. Its what breathes in me keeps me alive. its all there is to me. But if its not enough for anyone, then oh i am sorry,  damn i am hurting and God it kills me, but its impossible for me to be something or someone else or be what you may have approved.

I have learned this though that without acceptance there can be no relation. Without forgiveness without ignoring, without letting people be.

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